The Catwalk Queen

FormerModel appeared today after a seven week absence. Having fallen over outside the pub and then been taken to hospital for further tests, the verdict came back as liver failure. Seven weeks without a Carlsberg seems to have crippled her: she is wheeled in for a visit, yellow-faced, having aged twenty years in two months. We place bets on how many people she will have at her funeral: BeardyBarman whispers that it will be very few.

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